"today i am reminded of my shortcomings"

i've mentioned before that one of my goals this year is to read through the Bible. i should probably be farther along than i am, but lately i've put more effort to be consistent. anyway, today i read something that really had me thinking.

i was reading in genesis 41, where pharaoh has some disturbing dreams that no one could interpret. the cupbearer realizes that he forgot all about joseph, the one who had interpreted his own dream while he and the baker were in prison. the cupbearer talks with pharoah, and begins with,

"today i am reminded of my shortcomings." (genesis 41:9)

i literally stopped reading right there because something clicked. there are so many things that remind me of my own sins. i disobey God. i find ways to get out of doing what i should. i take the easy way out at work sometimes. i get mad easily. i sin.

today was not a great day. it wasn't even a good day. my kids frustrated the life out of me. they didn't listen. they ran around the room. they ran into each other. they yelled at each other. they were disrespecful. and as i stood in front of them, getting ready to blast them for their behavior, i heard in my head:

"today i am reminded of my shortcomings."

how am i any different from my first graders? i know how to act; i know how i should live. but i don't. i sin. i throw God's commands back at Him as if to say, "i don't care what i should do. i want to do things my way." then, like my first graders, i cry, whine and complain when things blow up in my face and God disciplines me. why? i bring this on myself.

"today i am reminded of my shortcomings."

i think that being reminded of my shortcomings is good for me. it reminds me that there is no way that i could ever be in control of my own life. the only way to truly live my life is to depend on God for his direction and guidance. but it also reminds me that God can turn my shortcomings into something beautiful, something to be used for His glory. what could be better?